"...V nz lbhe sngure..."

One of the questions that is constantly debated on the internet is this; at what point is it acceptable to discuss elements of a TV show, or a film, or a book, or a comic considered to be a "spoiler".  Seeing this mentioned by one of my friends on FaceBook today has got me thinking, so... today I'm talking spoilers. 

(Oh, and for avoidance of doubt, just in case; for the purposes of this article I'll be using rot13 for anything that could be considered a spoiler. Just in case... yes, even that moment in The Empire Strikes Back. rot13.com to decode the spoilers...)

There are a number of schools of thought on this matter. Well, really, three. Or four.

1 - Sod it, just discuss anything, at any time, even if it's stuff that hasn't aired yet. Spoil, spoil, SPOIL!

2 - As soon as something has been screened/released it's fair game for discussion of all elements. If you haven't seen it yet, that's your bad.

3 - Wait until a reasonable amount of time has passed, by which time pretty much everyone interested should have seen/read it, and then discuss freely. 

4 - You must never mention any element which could constitute a spoiler. Ever. 

Now, not all of these schools of thought are created equally... the first one is clearly a load of bobbins as the vast majority of people don't want to be spoiled in advance of seeing/reading something. There are some who are not bothered by being spoiled, but these are very much in the minority. And they 

The fourth is also problematic, as it would mean that you could never mention, for example, that in The Sixth Sense Oehpr Jvyyvf vf abg bayl zreryl qrnq, ur'f ernyyl zbfg fvapreryl qrnq. Or that in The Empire Strikes Back vg gheaf bhg gung gur ovt onq thl va gur ovt uryzrg, Qnegu Inqre, vf ernyyl gur sngure bs gur yrnq tbbq thl, Yhxr Fxljnyxre. 

Talking of this latter spoiler, only a few weeks ago I was talking to my son and daughter about Star Wars, and I happened to mention in the general conversation that Inqre jnf Yhxr'f qnq; and she exclaimed with quite some shock, "Jung? Qnegu Inqre vf Yhxr'f qnq?" She just didn't know this, and I felt really bad for spoiling it for her...

The thing is, to us oldies, stuff like that is just part of our modern culture, and we forget that for these young whippersnappers it's all new stuff. To us it's a part of our childhood; to them it's something new...

I'd always have tended to be of the opinion that the second option was the correct one; after all, it's been aired, and if you've not seen it well, that's on you. You can't expect the world to wait for you to catch up. Certainly there have been times when I've not seen an episode of Dr Who on transmission and I've deliberately avoided going on the internet until I'd seen it, lest I be spoiled. Then, there is also the argument that if you've got time to be faffing about on the internet, going to places where you may be spoiled, then you have time to watch the damn thing in the first place. 

But then I have also erred on the side of caution. For example, yesterday on FaceBook, I posted the following, after having seen the latest Sherlock;

"Now that was unexpected... not the CAM thing, as you could see his fate coming a mile off, but that bit right at the end... do we have to wait another two years?"

I thought that made the point I was trying to make, without giving away anything I would consider a spoiler. Anyone that had seen the episode would know exactly what I was talking about. But those who hadn't seen it wouldn't really have a clue. It gives away nothing. If I had said (and this does contain epic spoilerage);

"Abj gung jnf harkcrpgrq... abg gur PNZ guvat, nf lbh pbhyq frr uvf sngr pbzvat n zvyr bss nf vg jnf znqr boivbhf gung Fureybpx jnf tbvat gb chg n ohyyrg va uvf urnq, ohg gung ovg evtug ng gur raq... jvgu Zbevnegl pbzvat onpx... vf ur ernyyl fgvyy nyvir? qb jr unir gb jnvg nabgure gjb lrnef gb svaq bhg?"

That would have been completely different. 

In the world we live in now there will be more and more people who watch programmes later on catch up services like the iPlayer; there's all sorts of shows that are having large numbers of viewing added to ratings via iPlayer. True, some of these will be repeat viewings, but a large chunk will be people watching for the first time. 

So, I tend to operate along the lines that I expect to be spoiled if I go on to FaceBook; so if I've not seen an episode of a TV show I'll just not go there until I've seen it. It's not hard. And I'll not visit specific parts of forums either. But, I'll know that the spoilers are out there, and really it's not for others to not spoil, rather for me to avoid them.

However, I'll also try not to spoil things myself, and I'll often err on the side of caution; on FaceBook, I'll be vague. On forums I'll use spoiler tags. Here on the blog I'll use rot13. 

Because, on the internet, where your posts are open for many to see, it's hard to ascertain who has and hasn't seen something. If you're having a chat, face to face, with friends it's very easy for someone to say "ooh! not seen that yet!" if there's danger of talk leading to spoilers. You can't do that on the net. I mean, I bet there's people here who don't yet know that npghnyyl, guvf rapelcgrq grkg qbrfa'g unir n fcbvyre naq vg'f bayl urer sbe zr gb frr vs crbcyr npghnyyl cnl nggragvba. Vs lbh unir qrpbqrq guvf, chg n pbzzrag fnlvat "V ybir jbzongf." 

So, basically, when it comes to spoilers, I think it's best to invoke Wheaton's Law; don't be a dick.